251: I'm Not Lovable with Vincent Genna

Psychic therapist, medium, podcast host of The Genna Effect, and author of The Secret That’s Holding You Back, Vincent Genna, joins Chelsea 5:30 minutes in to explain how we are always manifesting what we believe about ourselves — hence, why the most courageous work we can ever undergo is discovering (and changing!) what it is we actually believe. 

Standout takeaways: every hurt creates a scar which, left unhealed, can be inflamed by future painful events, all the “I’m nots” — I’m not smart enough, I’m not good enough, etc. — has a common denominator pain of “I’m not lovable,” as soon as we detach from source, we feel abandoned, neglected, jealous, and angry, coping mechanisms are in place so we survive not thrive which is why we must disempower our defense mechanisms as adults, the 3 R exercise for better beliefs: review, replace, reinforce, attraction has nothing to do with another person, and everything to do with our beliefs about ourselves, the healing part of us that is loving ourselves more is not going to choose partners out of desperation, discretion comes with true self-love, reparenting ourselves sounds like the adult version of ourselves reasoning with our inner child, the harming effects of relationships built on a sexual foundation versus an emotional foundation first, and the major reason for mindfulness is to hear and understand what we are thinking so we can change it and evolve beyond our habits and history.

Vincent Genna:

Website & Services: https://vincentgenna.com
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/vinnygenna
Twitter: https://twitter.com/vgbelieve
Book: The Secret That’s Holding You Back
Podcast: The Genna Effect

Chelsea Leigh Trescott:

Website: https://breakupward.com
Email: chelsea@breakupward.com
Advice Column: https://www.huffpost.com
Writing: https://thoughtcatalog.com/chelsea-leigh-trescott
Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/thankyouheartbreak
Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/musings